Give me a hint of what to talk about!!!

If youre reading this please give me a hint of what you would like to here on a lecture on "gayactivism in the Levant/how openminded are we (read west)?

Youre wiews are very valuable to me. My mission in not trying to "liberate" the world but trying to coexist. And living for my mantra " all I can do is to try to understand".

Peace out youre undercover lover brother A of Arabia

Sexual orientalism part1

I will every now and then deal with this subjekt that i call "sexualorientalism". This ism, that I can find well spred in the gaycomunity in the west.

When I started studying Arabic and gay guys heard it their first comment was "So you're gonna fuck arabs!!". Yeas my friends I study one of the hardest languaqes in the world to be able to fuck!!!!!. This coments continued and when the same people got to know that I was moving to Syria to study, it became. " So you're gonna fuck there? But is'nt it dangerous? Will you not be killed?"

These coments made me wanna start this blog. With this blog i wanna deal with my own sexualorientalism. This phenomenon penetrates every sphere. I remember ten years ago when I wanted to buy books about the subject gay life and Middle East. The only book i could find was " Sexuality and Eroticism Among Males in Moslem Societies" written of two guys. It was all about how to get laid with horny and frustrated arabs, and this book goes under " gay and lesbian studies".

I do write about having sex in this blog. This blog is about my every day life trying to understand and sex is part of my life and a part of my dialog. But as a gay guy i know how it is to be limited to only be sexual by the heteronormative society and I dont wanna do that to another, at least I wanna try.

A fictional but funny story about Abu Nuwas

I got a new hero his name is Abu Nuwas one of the giants among the classical poets (750-810) and the most modern man on earth. He is the Oscar Wilde of the Middle East. Abu Nuwas wrote love poems about boys, conqubins,wine and not only that but about religion and pluralism.He wanted to stand out and didnt feel that he had to be a part of a homogenic comunity. "My religion is my religion....through sins I will clens my soul".

I will share a funny story. I'ts a fictional story about dear Abu Nuwas written by the Egyptian poet Kamil al-Shinnawi. The story is about how Abu met his mentor/lover Walibah bin al-Hubab.

"Abu Nuwas walked with him. When they arrived at his house, after they drank and ate, Walibah wanted him. When he disrobed him and saw the beauty of his body, he could not but kiss him on the anus. Abu Nuwas farted. So he said to him: What is this sly boy? He answered: I did not want the known proverb to be lost and to come true, namely: The penalty for he who kisses the anus is its fart."

Abu Nuwas is so cool my friends. I think I did the same thing first time I was given a rim job.

The story of a hetero-married gay man in Syria or how to design youre life. Part 2

I met this other man through the datingsite ”Hairyturks”. A site for men who doesnt epilate theire hairy chest or back and feel at ease with the oriental image, more Muscat then Miami. His nickname was Hothabib and it felt that it could be a hot date by his body pictures.

We met at Bab Touma, one of the ancient gates that leads to the Old Town in Damascus, and Hothabib served my pseudoorientalist character with lust, wearing a moustache. So me and my ”autentic” arab took a throll around the old town chatting away about this and that. Hothabib was married with four kids, he owned a workshop by the Ummayad Mosque and he was by all thankfull for his artisan talent. We headed towards his workshop were our date where taking place because of his family situation.

We reached his workshop and numerous thé pots in coppar met me as I entered. The place had a table with a computer, a small stove and a cat. The cattle got heated and we started our session with a cup of relaxing thé. He put his computer on and asked what kind of gayporn I wanted to see and I said that anything goes. His computer was filled with porn in the format of films and pictures. We started looking to get in the right mood. He asked me through the whole session if I enjoyed the porn and if I wanted more thé. This beautiful Arab hosptality in combination with the gayporn made me smile. Because it could be just me being a tourist wanting to by a pot or two, but this time it was desires beyond shopping and the friendliness was still there.

We got on it and we did it, a fastfood romance and quick close encounter and goodbye. What strucked me afterwards was the feeling of his little workshop to be this man’s 10% of being gay in a hetero marriage. In there no one except him had access.It was his little lovechack to make it possible to puzzle the impossible.

I couldnt help but think about what my girlfriend told me, that heteromarried lesbians while there husbands are out and the kids are at school invite theire mistress to come over. Maby while he has his romances in his workshop his wife invites her’s to become whall.

A of Arabia is having lectures on Stockholm Gay Pride

If u can attend dont miss me lecture at the Pride House that is hosted by the Culture house in Stockholm.

Tuesday 28/7 kl 14.00-14.45 at the World News Café (Kulturhuset) in english
Fredag 31/7 14.00-14.45 på Klarabion (Kulturhuset) in swedish

The story of a hetero-married gay man in Syria or how to design youre life.

I met this man a while ago in Damascus. We met through the net and decided to hook up. When I called him up, he pointed out that he couldnt speak freely beacuse of all the ”damn heteros” at his office and he asked if we could go to the gay part of Damascus to be with ”our” kind. We decided to meet up in Sha’laan. And because of his comments and will to be with his comunity I thought that this blind date was going to be a bigshot in the Damascus gaylife.

But the man that showed up didnt wore tight energy jeans or spikes in his hair, but was a very modest man in a grey suit. I felt instantly that this was not a sex or a love date situation, but got curious to find out the man behind the suit. We sat down in a café and his story began.

He was a married man in his late forties with two kids lets call him Farhad. Farhad found out in collage that he was gay, after a few ”close encounters” with other guys and him wanting more even after the sex segrigated school. The preassure to get married got closer and he tried to escape to Europe. The escape didnt work out so he had to face the fact that the only way to continue his life was within the ”holy matrimony”.

Farhads mom picked out a wife for him and he kept his gaylife on the down low during the first child. After a while and a lot of frustration was it impossible to fake his life anymore. ” I love myself to much to not hurt myself like that”. He started to network with others in his situation, and created a sort of network with other married men. They ususally meet ones a week and through the meetings make them real in front of eachother. ” I am 90% with my family that I love with all my heart but 10% is dedicated to my gaylife that I have to give myself to be able to exist”.

Farhads family doesnt know about this, and instinctively we might want to call him a prick. But remember that his marriage wasnt about love but a deal to make the traditions to go on. I got so happy to here a gayman that have to live the traditionel heteronormative life, love himself so much so he dont allow himself to be desperate and unhappy. A lot of the married men, I meet in the hamams and in the parks, that are letting off steam and make the sexuality between men to only become dirty, (I dont mind to be dirty but i want to have a choise), makes this man a hero in my eyes. ” Nobody can make me feel like a freak or tell me that im disgusting, I love who I am”.